Gout and Diapers with Suspenders

 Just when you think things cannot possibly get any worse ..... You wake up free of the nagging pain behind your knee and think things are looking up, only to discover your big toe is stiff, swollen and hot to the touch. Gout. No idea what the trigger is, or I would definitely eliminate it from my diet.

That was yesterday. I sat with the foot propped up and iced, drinking the nasty cherry juice that helps eliminate uric acid from the body. Does it work? I don't know, but I drink it with good faith. Today is more of the same. I did go with the chauffeur to obtain drinking water and pick up some doggie diapers.

Doggie diapers, you ask? Poor old Toni is incontinent. Little puddles form in her wake. She tries to go out and even tries to pee on the pee-pad, but she can't. I dutifully measured her "waist" and found it to be a svelte 19". I looked on-line to determine the size I should buy. Medium on one site, large on another. That did not really help. I decided to get some disposable ones until the washable ones arrive. 

So, the trip to Walmart needed to include night crawlers, Dora, the turtle's favorite food. We had a plan. He was going to fill the water bottles, and I was on a mission to obtain worms and diapers. On my way into the store, I was immediately distracted by Valentine candy on display. Peeps!! Butterfinger flavored peeps!

Well, you know a package went into my cart! Then I put the worms from the sporting goods department in and headed to the pet supplies. They had a huge display of pee-pads. Plain ones, printed ones, scented ones and everything in between. Surely the diapers should be close by. They had exactly 2 packages of doggie diapers for female dogs. One was XS and one was small. I chose the small and decided I would use duct tape and make it work.

I was ready to go, toe beating in time with my heartbeat. The chauffeur, my husband, Drew called me and told me the water dispenser was not working. That is what we came for. No other store has filtered water for refilling water bottles here. Just Walmart. They have a monopoly on the water filling business.

I met up with Drew, and he decided we could just go on to Murphy Walmart. I decided to just get everything there. They even had a better display of doggie diapers and had medium. Tossed a pack in the cart and moved on to sporting goods to get the worms. They also had Valentine merch displayed, but no peeps. Came home, put a diaper on the dog after mopping up her pee. I close our bedroom door when we leave them at home, so I didn't have to mop it, but I did have the hall and the entire floorspace. Yes, we left a pee-pad down and it was soaked. I think her brother dogs joined in the pee-a-thon.

She just sauntered through with the diaper hanging off the end of her tail with a bewildered look on her sweet gray face. Seems I will need to get the ones with suspenders for her. Yes, that is a thing.