How Stupid Can One Man Be?
Today has been a trying day. The Patient had a follow-up appointment with the primary to see if his numbers from the blood draw have gone back to normal. You might recall that this is the doctor who prescribe 60 pain pills to The Patient .....
There is a reason I always tag along to his appointments. I have to listen to what is being said and be the voice of reason. The Patient was complaining about the pain he was still experiencing. We are old, it takes longer to heal. Add to that the fact that he did not follow up with the re-hab. He had the information but dug his heels in and simply refused to call. He wants me to do it, and I want him to be more responsible about his own health. I dug MY heels in and I refused to call.
His numbers were good and the doctor gave ME a post it note with the phone number for re-hab. They are in a conspiracy to make me be the caregiver and I do NOT want the job. As it stands, I already do everything. My ganglion cyst has grown back to its full size and hurts if I overdo it. I don't ask for pain pills, I suck it up and do what needs to be done. I do complain sometimes, but with his selective hearing it falls on deaf ears.
As I just pointed out to The Patient, I did not get the royal treatment when I was in pain. He did make the bed once and he did get take-out food and he did do ONE load of laundry. But when the symphony of barking dogs started in the early morning, he did not get up and take them out and feed them. He yelled at them to stop barking, but they know who the real boss is.
I was at the end of a gout attack in my big toe in addition to the hand surgery, but I hoisted myself out of bed and took care of my fur babies. Did I resent it? Of course I did! Did I bother to rub his face in it? No, I stored it away with all my other ammunition and waited for a good time to use it. That was today. I came home to a dirty kitchen. The Patient had made himself some food. He left the can opener out; the pan he used was in the sink and all the utensils were scattered about. The plate, along with the uneaten food was balanced precariously on the edge of the counter.
That triggered me and I exploded. I will say that I was not just standing there and telling The Patient what was bothering me. I was washing the dishes and loading the washer as I spoke. I might have continued saving all the ammunition accumulated if he had not pointed out that he was incapacitated after his wreck with the tree and the mower. How stupid can one man be, you might be asking. Well, now you know!
I read the title and laughed. They can be endlessly stupid. They weaponize incompetence. When Marc almost died from pneumonia because he refused to go to the doctor or ER until he was too weak to resist my ultimatum...get in the car or I'm calling an ambulance...once he was stable I let him have it. I was so pissed. This shit ends NOW. I'd be handing the Patient the sticky note and the phone and in his face until he called. I also would not have been very pleasant telling him he'd best get in there and clean up the kitchen mess he left.
ReplyDeleteI hate to tell you, but if The Patient has been like this for decades he probably won't change :-(
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain. Not the literal pain of the wrist ganglion or gout. But the pain in the rumpus from being a reluctant caregiver. I have my on post-surgery patient, who is able to carry a bottle of water from the refrigerator to drink, but unable to carry the empty water bottle back to the kitchen. Just like yours is too incapacitated to clean up, but still able to make himself some food.
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